Porcelain Press. Publisher

June 10, 2026

Dan de Lion. Author

Toilet. Truth. Text. Title

The Aldi Car Park Blues

Verse 1

Got a trolley full of holy ones, wheels wobbling down the road, Got a trolley full of holy ones, wheels wobbling down the road, I am in this Aldi car park, carrying my load.

Verse 2

Buddha by the biscuits, Jesus drooling by the wine, Buddha by the biscuits, Jesus drooling by the wine, Confucius by the toilet rolls saying, “Son, you’ll be just fine.”

Verse 3

Shamans in the child seat, rattles shaking in the breeze, Shamans in the child seat, rattles shaking in the breeze, Dreamtime is in the pharmacy saying, “Ibuprofen please.”

Verse 4

Zoroaster’s shivering between the frozen peas, Zoroaster’s shivering between the frozen peas, Shinto hanging onto the handle, saying, “Keep your mind at ease.”

Verse 5

Baha’i at the butchers, saying peace to everyone, Baha’i at the butchers, saying peace to everyone, Animism in the monkey house sayin’, “Life lives on and on.”

Verse 6

Trolley wheel’s a‑wobbling, my feet stay on the ground, Trolley wheel’s a‑wobbling, my feet stay on the ground, Earth stays on its orbit, spinning round and round.

Refrain

I shall not, I shall not be moved, I shall not, I shall not be moved, Like a trolley in Aldi’s trolley rack, I shall not be moved.

P.S. Daft is the Raft that will save us!